We all lead busy lives—work, kids, social commitments, stress, social media, etc. Sadly, when we are pushed for time, something's gotta give, and all too often, it’s not work or the emails that do. In a recent survey, American couples listed time constraints as the Number One killer of regular intimacy. That is sad! These stats are not indicative of only American couples either - lovers across the globe seem to have the same unwelcome problem. Yet, it is a bit of a Catch-22 situation, as healthy relationships are pretty complex and diverse and require dedicated input to survive.
Copious websites offer copious advice on how best to address this issue, but if you have no time for sex, you have even less time to surf the web. So, let's help you with a few brief tips on addressing this challenge.
Recreating Intimacy
The only and most important way to start tackling your problem is to rebuild and hang on to intimacy in your lives. Yes, it takes effort, discipline, dialogue and determination, not to mention love, but it must be done to save the 'sexy' in your sex life. As Psychology Today quips:
"This is not a matter of 'working on your relationship', but rather, it’s about feeding the relationship and giving it the time, energy, attention, care, and pleasure that it requires in order to thrive."
And here's how we suggest you go about it to make it exciting:
1. Schedule Intimate Time TogetherYou have been scheduling time for everything else, so why not "together time"? And while pre-planned sex might seem a bit of a mood dampener, it’s a wise and crucial start to reminding each other just how good intimacy can be. Once you do make the effort to be with each other, you will be glad you did and keen for more! Forget the dishes for now, turn off your laptop, and engage with each other - even if it's just to hold hands and stroll around the neighbourhood for half an hour, or share an ice cream whilst watching the sunset. The dishes can wait.
2. Spice Things UpMake an extra effort to ensure each physical embrace is a sizzling one. Let one of our perfect toys or lingerie/sexy outfits get the ball rolling. And remember our stimulating lubricants that get any partaker hopping on their toes. Be daring, be imaginative, and lighten it up.Â
3. Organise a Date NightThere’s more to intimacy than just sex, as you know. Date Nights mean focusing only on your other. Be in the Now. Once a week or once a fortnight, set aside an evening to share a romantic meal, or a relaxing massage, have a meaningful conversation, or go to the movies. Reconnect with your partner and stir up the first whiff of renewed intimacy. Now book a babysitter, be bold and paint the town red!
4. Go to Bed at the Same TimeIt may seem insignificant, but if one partner is fast asleep when the other goes to bed, the chances of any physical activity are pretty much zero. For some, snoring can also be a deal breaker. Go to bed together - the snores won’t intrude, and you might get lucky!
5. No TV in the BedroomThis is a massive pink elephant in the room for most men. Guys and gals, you will not believe what a sneaky mood breaker the TV can be. Take care not to forfeit valuable togetherness for your favourite programme. Now, read that again! However, we do concede that an hour of relaxation watching TV is sometimes reviving. Solution? Compromise. It's worth it.
6. Grab A Weekend AwayA sassy weekend away is the greatest investment one can make towards reigniting your love life. Sure, it needs planning and commitment, but a break away is worth its weight in gold. It's exhilarating, it's coltish, and oh-so-much fun! No need to travel great distances either - the mere change of scenery and escape from routine is often the only vigour pill you need.
Think about it - all these tactics can be implemented without too much effort. Sir, court your lady again! Madam, see that strapping Hulk you fell for in the beginning! You'll be amazed at the zest this will inject into not only your partner but you, too.
Every stab at reconnecting rekindles the flame, so give it a go and have fun while you do!