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May is International Masturbation Month

  • 3 min read

Forget any myth or negative belief--the first thing you need to know about masturbation is that it is natural. It is fantastic. And we’re on a mission to promote sex positivity and celebrate self pleasure!

I remember sitting in my high school Life Orientation class as the discussion turned to masturbation;

”90% of teens over the age of 16 have masturbated.”

What? Me? Masturbate?! NEVER!!!

“The other 10% of you are lying!”.  

As a pasty, pubescent boy who had very recently discovered the pleasures of self loving, I slunk deeply into my seat, turning an intense shade of scarlet whilst avoiding eye contact with my equally abashed classmates.

 

The Shame of Being a Masturbator.

Masturbation has been portrayed as a taboo act ever since 1712, when John Marten, a self-educated surgeon, penned his book Onania; or, The Heinous Sin of Self Pollution and all its Frightful Consequences, in both SEXES Considered, with Spiritual and Physical Advice to those who have already injured themselves by this abominable practice. And seasonable Admonition to the Youth of the nation of Both SEXES.  Masturbation was the cause of an array of ailments; headaches, bowel disorder, short-sightedness and rheumatism to name a few. If left untreated, this habit would eventually lead to agonizing death.  The attack on “Self Pollution” continued throughout the 19th Century with the likes of JH Kellog (Yup, the guy who created those delicious breakfast cereals) believing signs of masturbation included acne and convulsions.

So needless to say, society hadn’t been very pro-masturbation in the past and this had seeped down through the generations into that Life Orientation classroom where my classmates and I sat, horrendously ashamed of our self exploration.

With a natural-born sexual curiosity, most guys’ sex education begins behind closed doors, Sports Illustrated in hand and the realisation of the pleasure that can be brought on with a simple wrist action. The excitement of this new discovery is quickly thwarted, when he (incorrectly) learns that masturbation is wrong, dirty and definitely not to be spoken about.  With feelings of guilt and shame, he is left to make sense of his first sexual experience, alone.

This impacts drastically on men’s relationships with their sexual partners and themselves. Their sexual awareness is formed by a boy, hidden away, forced to teach himself about sex and pleasure. The focus being on getting the job done, and getting it done quickly. This habit is mirrored in the bedroom with men focusing more on their own pleasure and finishing a little sooner than is ideal for their partners.  From a quick Google search for Sexual Endurance, a whopping 32 300 000 results come up in 0.36 seconds.

 

The Truth About Masturbation.

According to research, over 95% of males have masturbated to orgasm by the age of 20.  Proving that regardless of the (incorrect) stigma attached to the act, it’s still happening, a lot!

And rightfully so. The health benefits are numerous;

  • You Feel Happier: Post-Orgasm, your brain is flooded with the “feel-good” chemicals, dopamine and serotonin.
  • You Sleep Better: If you are one of 30-40% of people who suffer with insomnia, masturbation aids in the quality of sleep.
  • You Reduce the Risk of Prostate Cancer: Frequent ejaculation improves prostate health and lowers the risk of prostate cancer.

Along with the health improvements, masturbation can ramp up your sex life. With regular masturbation, you learn how you like to be touched, where you like to be touched and for how long. Being comfortable with your own sexual responses helps you better communicate them to your partner making sex that much more amazing! And who doesn’t want more amazing sex, more often?

 

So own it! Masturbation is magical, good for you and everybody is doing it. And if you can’t love yourself, how in the world are you going to love anybody else - can I get an Amen up in here?! If you’re someone who is already on the Self Loving Pleasure Train, why not add a toy to the mix? Matilda’s has some fabulous toys for boys that will take your solo play to new heights.