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March 06, 2018

Understanding the female orgasm

How to Pleasure your Lady

Men want to make their women feel good. They genuinely want the experience to be as good for their partners as it is for them. But a woman's body is a complicated thing - it takes more than just intercourse to make her come. For women, the game is as much about the mental as it is the physical. It's a combination of delicate moves, suggestions and techniques that can bring her to orgasm, and sometimes, even when you do get these things right, she may still not come. Sigh. 

We want to help you improve your chances, so here are some tips that will stand you in good stead. 

Firstly, let's talk about the physical elements: 

The clitoris

This is described by sexologists as the organ that gives women sexual pleasure. That is its sole purpose. Not reproduction. Just pleasure. Although you get other types of  orgasms, we’re going to stick with the clitoral orgasm because it’s the easiest to master.

The clitoris is the female equivalent to a man's penis. Both penis and clitoris comprise the same materials but put together in a different way. The clitoris has glans, a foreskin (AKA the hood), erectile tissue and even a small shaft - all the elements a penis has. It also swells when it is aroused.

How does it work?

There are six stages to the  female  orgasm :

  • Arousal - a warm flush that happens with foreplay where the blood rushes to her vulva and she becomes slick with her own natural lubrication
  • Heightened vitals - breathing becomes hot and heavy, her nipples erect and the lower part of her vagina narrows
  • Nearing threshold - the tension, a mix of nerves in her genitals, pelvis, bum and thighs pulses on the verge of the big arrival
  • The big bang - the moment when she orgasms and her uterus and anus contract simultaneously in intervals. On the orgasm richter scale a small orgasm reaches 3 - 5 contractions and a big one is estimated at about 15  
  • Rest - thereafter she slides into a natural state of relaxation

Surveys indicate that only 57% of women climax during partnered sex as opposed to the 95% indicated by men. 67% of women admitted to  faking,  at some point or another, an orgasm.

Fifty to 75 percent of women who have climaxes (orgasms) need to have their clitoris touched (clitoral stimulation).

The Orgasm-Guide

  • Foreplay- a women needs about 15 minutes of arousal time. That means kissing and petting. Don’t just kiss her mouth - explore her body with your tongue (other erogenous zones are the neck, breasts and thighs). But stay away from her crotch and keep your clothes on - or most of them anyway.
  • When you sense that her vitals have heightened - build the anticipation and maintain the connection. Talk dirty. Slowly undress her. Gently caress her clitoris.
  • With all the tension mounted - you are now ready for serious action. Get naked! If her body isn’t slick enough use  lube.  Apply direct stimulation to the clitoris with either your fingers or your tongue. If you prefer your penis then try a  cock ring  like the  Lost In Each Other  that gives equal pleasure to both partners
  • Climax - apply repeated, rhythmic strokes at the base of the clitoris. Listen to her instructions - speed it up or slow it down.
  • Don’t stop! Continue with the clitoral stimulation as she climaxes but slow it down a bit so that she can recover before her next round - multiple orgasms are the best!

Master the art of making a woman orgasm. Up the foreplay with lube or something a bit more stimulating like a  cock ring or  vibrator . Our range of  sex toys  are also a sure-fire way to increase the odds of making her come! 



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