When it comes to anal sex, who loves it more? Men or women? A lot of you may think anal is preferred by men: there are millions of online articles discussing the “male fascination” with heterosexual anal sex, loads of porn movies that fetishize anal, and hundreds of agony aunt columns offering advice to women who don’t know if they should try anal with their keen-as-mustard partners. But, does this mean that men like it more than women?
Of course a lot of men enjoy anal! In terms of giving, it feels completely different from vaginal sex (the novelty factor) and it’s a thrilling new way to enjoy sex. Exciting!
In terms of receiving, it’s a well-known fact that a man’s prostate gland is as potent as a woman’s G-spot. When stimulated, the prostate can result in powerful and intense orgasms for men. Thought Catalog had this to say about this “noble yet misunderstood gland”:
“It’s a mischievous lump of human tissue that can lead every male straight or gay, down a yellow-brick road, past the pearly gates, and into a garden of earthly delights…. the male prostate gland can help produce orgasms so intense, farmers who live two counties from yours will hear you screaming in pleasure.”
Indeed. So, it’s no real mystery why men like receiving stimulation in this area. But, what about women?
“Since 1992, the percentage of women aged 20-24 who say they've tried anal sex has doubled to 40 percent. The percentage of women aged 20-39 who say they've done it in the past year has doubled to more than 20 percent. And 94 percent of women who received anal sex in their last encounter said they reached orgasm—a higher rate of orgasm than was reported by women who had vaginal intercourse or received oral sex.”
So although the majority aren’t engaging in anal sex, the numbers of women enjoying it are definitely on the rise. And why wouldn’t they be? Here are some reasons why women love anal sex – just as much as men:
Indulging in anal play can result in some pretty powerful orgasms, especially when combined with other stimulation (clitoral for example). Slate once again reports, “94 per cent of women who received anal sex in their last encounter said they reached orgasm — a higher rate of orgasm than was reported by women who had vaginal intercourse or received oral sex.”
We think it’s the sense of truly opening up to your partner, of being completely vulnerable and engaging in a sexual act that is still considered a little taboo.
There is lots of research out there that shows that women who engage in anal sex experience more orgasms. Not from anal sex alone, but from their overall sexual activity. Women who are willing to engage in anal sex tend to be more confident, more adventurous, and more sensual in bed, and therefore, also more orgasmic. When you’re willing to try new things, when you’re in touch with your sexuality and keen to be vulnerable with your partner, more pleasure will invariably result.
The more you love and trust someone, the more likely you are to try new things, and the more likely you are to achieve orgasm. Partners who are connected on many levels – physical, mental, spiritual – are more likely to truly explore one another’s bodies. There is no shame – just enjoyment and love. Engaging in something like anal also serves to strengthen these bonds – especially for a woman, who trusts a man enough to give him an “all-access” pass. “Anal sex is heavily biased towards intimate relationships.” Isn’t that beautiful?
Anal sex requires a whole new level of foreplay. You’ve got to be there physically and emotionally, and that takes time and effort. All this also then supports the point above: the care involved with anal (to make sure you don’t hurt your partner) emanates from a relationship of love and trust.
Men and women both like anal sex then, for similar reasons: it feels good, it results in more powerful orgasms more often, and it forms part of a healthy and happy sexual relationship between two people who love and trust each other. And although there may be more men partaking in this delightful pleasure, it doesn’t necessarily mean they like it more. We encourage more women to give anal sex a go – and experience the joys of back door bliss. Trust us, once you go back, you’ll never go back. Har har.
At Matilda’s, we’ve got a range of anal toys that you can experiment with. If you’re new to anal, check out our Beginner’s Guide to Anal Toys, and if you’re looking for some fun new toys to play with, you can see our anal collection here. Have fun!