Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend

Especially diamonds like the Bijoux Indiscrets!

The Rocket Scientist reviews the Bijoux Indiscrets Twenty-One, and finds it quite pleasing indeed. Something a bit different dropped through my letterbox recently. Or rather, was hand-delivered in discreet packaging by a friendly courier. It was a golden diamond.

Yes, at first glance, it would seem that the Bijoux Indiscrets Twenty-One is a joint homage to South Africa’s sparkly mining products.

By rights, should they bring out the Twenty-Two along the same mining theme, it’ll be a coal-coloured lump of uranium. (If anyone from Bijoux Indiscrets is reading this: I don’t think it’s going to sell quite as well as this one.)

Before continuing, I should maybe point out that the Twenty-One isn’t actually made of gold or diamonds. It’s hard, smooth, good quality plastic. And there’s no doubt that the whole flashy shininess of the gold and the unusual gem shape is a bit of a gimmick. But it’s a kind of cool gimmick too. Like I said, it’s something a bit different.

Bijoux Indiscrets Twenty-One: the basics first

Twenty-One comes, appropriately enough, in a black, cubic jewellery style box, displayed like a new bracelet or necklace as you flip open the lid. It’s a pleasing thing to hold, comfortable in your hand, not too heavy, but comfortingly rather chunky. It feels robust. The top of the diamond screws off to reveal the charging port (USB to a jack socket, like an iPod Shuffle).Charging is indicated by the flashing red light surrounding the button on the side, which stays on when the battery is full.

Performance Pleasure

The first thing you notice is that it’s powerful. Wickedly, wickedly powerful. I’m guessing that this is because it’s basically just a potent motor encased in a shiny shell, and so there’s nowhere else for the power to go.

It’s lean and mean: a vibrator that’s on the Noakes diet and does crossfit. There are three speeds, which, as usual, you scroll through by pressing the power button. The first is a steady, low buzz; the second is what you might expect full speed to be like on any other vibrator. That leaves you with the top speed, which should probably come with some sort of health warning.

Ding Dong! And then for once, the obligatory programmes which follow are useful and innovative, full of intermittent pulses, waves, crescendos and diminuendos: enough variety to leave you guessing what’s coming next. It’s quite fun.

Volume is a bit of an issue though, especially on those programmes – perhaps because of its power, it’s not the quietest toy out there. It’s worth noting that Bijoux Indiscrets guys aren’t wrong about the versatility of the shape, either.

The different edges and faces allow you to use the vibrations in different ways and different places. The flat top spreads the wealth and is great on thighs and bums to warm things up, the angle between the flat face and the sides of the gem are perfect for vulval stimulation, while the (rather pointy) tip of the diamond means that you can single out the clitoris (or anywhere else) for special attention with pinpoint accuracy.

You can probably work out the cumulative effects of these useful attributes, and you’re probably absolutely right.

I also have to mention that an unexpected additional plus of the shape is that the Twenty-One is also surprisingly easy to grip, whatever way you’re holding it. All in all, this is a great little toy. Sure, the whole shiny ‘golden diamond’ thing may be a bit of brash publicity stunt, but really it’s no worse than most bottles of perfume.

And anyway, what a refreshing alternative to “traditional” shaped vibrators. Despite its small size, it packs one hell of a punch, so if you like your vibrations strong, you’re not going to be disappointed.