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February 14, 2018

Avoid these Valentine’s Day Mishaps at all costs!

Ah, Valentine’s Day. Providing you with great opportunity to disappoint or delight your partner depending on how thoughtful or insensitive you are. To help you avoid going down the disappointment road we’ve put together three fail-sure ways to ruin Valentine’s Day.

Basically, avoid doing these three things and you can breathe easy for another year.

The Inappropriate Gift

“My dad is terrible at giving gifts. One Valentine’s Day he gave my mom, who was very heavy at the time and was always trying to lose weight, a box of sugar-free chocolate and a scale. She cried for days.” (Anonymous on Reddit)

Ouch. That’s harsh. And apparently not unusual. We’ve read horror stories about people receiving tins of baked beans, frozen sausage rolls, vacuum cleaners and socks. It’s Valentine’s Day people – not self-help day, DIY day and especially not your-bum-looks-big-in-those-jeans day, so keep it sexy and romantic. Lingerie. Sex toys. Lube. Flowers. You’re in for the win.

The Cheapskate

Another firm un-favourite is the cheapskate – someone who cuts the corners, re-gifts old presents, pinches flowers from his auntie’s garden or generally excels at putting themselves in the dog box.

“We ended up breaking up! He bought me nothing and I bought him sports’ tickets. It’s not about the gifts, but still, cough up some chocolate or something!” (Brielle on Men’s Health)

We couldn’t agree more Brielle.

The “I Forgot” Excuse

If you are vehemently opposed to Valentine’s Day, then make it known to one another that you don’t intend to celebrate the occasion. Communication is key here people!

“We were strolling down the street when I mentioned that it was V-Day and I was excited to give him my gift. A few steps later, he spied a shop and ran in. Minutes later, he returned with a bag containing a pathetic, small heart-shaped box of chocolates.” (Audrey on Seventeen)

And the worst goes to:

“I had been dating a guy for exactly a year when he took me to a fancy restaurant on Valentine’s Day, which also happened to be our anniversary. Halfway through dinner, I see him get down on one knee and I start crying. He looks up at me and says ‘Oh no, I just dropped my napkin.’ When the cheque came, he flipped it over and wrote something down, then flipped it back over and said he was going to the bathroom. When I looked up a few minutes later, I spotted him exiting the restaurant. I grabbed the cheque on which he wrote, ‘You’re not the marrying type.’ So, not only did I get dumped on Valentine’s Day AND our one year anniversary, but I got stuck paying the bill.” (Linda on Men’s Health)

Now that we’ve dished out the worst of the lot, we hope that this gives you an idea of what not to do. Want advice on what to do? Buy some sexy lingerie, or a sex toy or two. Seriously, you’ll have your partner smiling for days. * Disclaimer: some stories have been edited for brevity and clarity.

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